Tammy'sFavoriteDish7DaysAWeek

Ingredients:

• TV
• Remote
• Car
• Keys
• Drivers License
• Unruly Children
  
• Mullah

Directions:

Pre-tune TV set to favorite show; place remote in visible, ready access area near couch...fluff and febreeze couch pillows and blankie......set mixture aside and allow to stand at room temperature for 30 minutes.

Meanwhile, retrieve keys; walk directly toward your vehicle. Sit inside and turn ignition on. At low-speed drive thru the streets of your neighborhood. Gradually find and add a child or two of yours. Increase now to medium speed and beat contents of vehicle until well disciplined. Scrape the sides of your hometown streets with your rubber tires. Continue beating contents at medium speed for 2 minutes more.

On high speed now head toward the nearest possible Chinese, Italian, Pizza, Mexican, or Fast Food Restaurant of your choice. Increase speed as you whip around corners until soft peaks form from the hills and mountain tops that can be seen in the distance.

When approaching restaraunt pull up to the drive-thru window. Speak loudly and clearly and state your families desired food order. Now carefully pull to second window. Place "mullah" thru window and pay for order. VERY IMPORTANT: DO NOT, REPEATING....DO NOT PULL AWAY UNTIL BAGS ARE CHECKED AND FULL ORDER IS IN PLACE AND SECURED. Slowly pull away.

Repeat above directions of driving, beating, speeding and whipping to arrive safely back at home. Turn car off. Step outside the vehicle. Grab food bags and children. Enter house. Spot check the home and pass out food to all ONLY when a wooden toothpick inserted and/or scraped across all furniture and floors comes out clean.

Approach previously set aside ingredients. Sit all butts down on fluffed, febreezed couch. Gently fold arms; say prayers; bless beloved food that now sits before you. Take remote in hand. Turn to favorite TV show. Stuff face until well done.